It's Been a minute....

Or should I say two years? Close to it!! WOW I'm writing this as a test post, just curious how many are still here to read this blog or if I should start another.  I was reading my posts from back in the day and WOW things change so much! I am happier now, and I've broken my online gaming addiction once and for all!!!  I'm so glad to be rid with that, I plan to talk about that some more in depth too!!  I'm proud to say I am back, and if ya'll are still here let me know!!!

Flu, Strep, etc.....

     Hey everyone! It's been far too long since I have wrote a blog to ya but... I've had good reason! I think I have been more sick the past three weeks than I have ever in my whole life.  It started with a cough about three weeks ago then went to headache, body ache, etc... I just kept feeling worse and worse.  My hubby made me go to the ER one night and they tested me for the flu,stre, and things and turns out I had Strep, Flu, Bronchitus, & Pluracy in my lungs.  I've been so sick, and hardly able to hold my head up much less be able to be online much at all.   So that is where I have been :(
      Another thing, I'm depressed.  I just can't shake my sad feelings sometimes, maybe it's the snow??  I'll be back to posting soon!! I am going to make this short. I'll get back to it soon! 

Now enter: THE FLU!!

      Okay so I haven't blogged in a couple days, I've not been feeling good.. right now I think I have the flu!  I had to rescedule my doctors appointment because I had forgotten my daughter had a dental appoint. at the sametime >_> soo I will go to the doctor tomorrow instead!  I've not been up to being on the pc too much honestly since I got sick :(.
       Sunday night at church my cough that I had been dealing with for two weeks became incredibly worse to me, and so when I got home I took some meds and went to bed. Monday I woke up feeling like crud! Weezing, coughing, and just body aches and all.  Really bad headache.. no appetite, and feeling just miserable.
       So I am gonna make this one short but I will feel better again soon and be back to bloggin!  *hugs* to you all!

Suddenly Gina...

   Okay, it's a random time for me in this blog. I have been awake for lets see.... well I'd say 48 hours easy now. I am not tired. My body is telling me to sleep but I can't turn my mind off long enough to let that happen.  I honestly think I have insomnia.
   My sister is my trusted sidekick threw most everything in my life, we basicly feel each others pains and when one of us is down the other is too and etc... I love her lots and she's amazing. I am trying to get her to startup a blog too and who knows maybe sometime soon she will! That would be totally amazing! You all would like her..
   So... I'm sitting up this late talking to my sister about things I like and don't like about my life and falling back into my pattern of.. I want to do this and be that.  It sucks sometimes when you look at yourself and really don't know what or who you are anymore. I feel like sometimes I'm a robot.  I walk threw life and do the daily motions but putting something real behind it is so hard for me.  Don't get me wrong I show my hubby love and trully mean it and my kids and family that isn't what I mean.. What I'm talking about is those times when I think.... Man I really need to start taking more pride in myself, clothes, hair, make-up... etc... I tell myself that I'm going to change and be more aware of myself and my body and start doing the right things; like dieting, only to let myself down again. 
   How can I start loving myself trully and start feeling better? I took the advice of FatAngryBlog and got myself some Vitamin D I'm hoping that it will start helping me feel better and things. If it worked for her I'm certain it'll work for me!!!  I'm going to try and start being more dedicated to my diet and health.  I need to I really do!
     I'm going to do something a little different.. I'm going to write a list right now of things about myself I want to change.... things that embarass me to even tell anyone but things that maybe if I see daily I won't forget what hurts me the most about myself.  Here it goes....

Drum Roll Please.....

THINGS ABOUT GINA I WANT TO CHANGE!!

• Self Esteem.  I have zero.
• Being tired all the time
• disliking my sister-in-law
• saying one thing & doing another.
• Fixing my hair.
• Doing my make-up.
• Spending time with my hubby
• actually complete a quilt, not just a top.
• Thinking negative about everything.
• being lazy about some things.
• being awkward in public.
• feeling like the world is out to get me.
• doing the same thing day in day out.
• break my addiction to secondlife.
• stop reading into things.
• start actually reading books.

Okay.. thats a start! I'm certain I will be adding much to this list as I have more time to think about it!  Now I want to make a promise to my blog....

1. I will not neglect you.
2. I will not lie to people to look cool.
3. I will not remove blog posts, no matter how stupid I look or feel when I go back and read them.
4. I will start posting more!
5. I'll be more responsive to everyone and everything around me or my blog.
6. I will post pictures of myself and face what I am.

Okay all! It's getting late and I need to try and make my body shutdown for sleep!! Tomorrow looks very much the same as today... sitting on the sofa watching tv with my beautiful daughters.... and cooking... yay fun!  It actually is fun :D  Take care! *HUGS*



Awards!... Who me? Thank you thank you!

Awesome! That's all I can say I was lucky enough to be given this award TWICE by two different bloggers and BOTH whom are my fave! So it's and honor! Thanks to you both! :D *HUGS*  I recieved this ward from : http://pizzacakespies.blogspot.com/ && also from FatAngryBlog ... Here are the few rules when recieving this award :D....

 

1. Post the award and link it back to the person who gave it to me.

Got that!

  

 

 

 

 

   

2. Share 7 things about yourself.

 

WOW. 7 things about myself... okay.. here goes...

1. 1. I have played the guitar and written music since I was about 20 years old, I've recorded a few songs and music is just my world, everything about it. Whatever I am feeling can usually be seen threwout the songs I'm listening too.
   2. I have and all out passion for dogs.  I love animals of any kind, but I especially love dogs.  I have a Bassett Hound that my husband and I got from the pound over 2 yrs ago and she's been and amazing dog, probably the smartest dog I've ever had!  Here is a picture of her.. We named her Mandylynn:
   3. I once met Johnny and June Carter Cash at a Lafollette, Tn Wal-Mart.  TRUE story! This was years ago, my sister and I had went there after a concert to check it out because c'mon you can't go by a strange Wal-Mart and not drop in. haha.  So glad we did that day!  I remember what he had in his buggy... Denture Adhesive and Cleaning tablets!! He said to me, " You gotta love standing in a check out line on a Friday night."  So yeh this was pretty amazing especially because I have this extreme respect for Johnny Cash he is one of my all time favorite muscians. Period!
   4. Quilting! It's one of my uttermost favorite things to do!  I'm still learning basics but I'm loving what I learn.. for christmas my sweet hubby got me a rotary cutting tool for fabric and a cutting board. I so love it. Last Christmas I got a sewing machine haha which was amazing.... sewing is GREAT!
   5. My hubby and Kids & I have this hobby, we live right beside a set of train tracks, so when we can we put pennies on the tracks and when the train runs over top them it basicly squishes the penny.  ok.. I'm not even sure Squish is a word, lol.
   6. I absolutley love being a house wife.  My husband is in a job that basicly allows me to be a stay at home mommy and take care of my three kids and clean and just be a wife and mother to my family && I love it.  I know some people might say that I am lazy but I'm not, this is a choice I made, I could get out and work.  I have and I held jobs plenty well enough and did them right... but nothing compares to being a stay at home mom for me... I actually really really like cleaning... && if you would ask anyone that knows me, they would say WHAT Gina? No way! .... I say... YES WAY! I love it! :) I'm one lucky girl!!!
   7. Last but not least.... I love fishing.  Nothing is better to me than a day sitting next to the water with some worms on my hook and sandwhiches in the cooler... catching fish... I just love it, and just recently we moved to a new home and I am lucky enough to have a small creek perfect for fishing right behind the house!!  I can't wait for spring to come!!! :D

There we go! Again, Thank you both for sending me this award it was really sweet of you and I feel grateful to have met people like you to look up to and admire!! Bless you! *HUGS*

Grr!!

I wrote a really long blog... and somehow when I clicked publish it had a glitch or issue and it told me to hit the back button soooo I did and BOOM the bloog is gone!!!!! >_> I will have to wait for a bit to post another.... See you all soon! *hugs*!

Check out this guy he rocks! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAibh3SqRUo

New Year, New Me.. Old Habit... Die Hard!!!

WOW! I guess everyone thought I completly ditched the blog! I haven't, I promise!! I have been in a "funk" I guess so to speak when it comes time to write I don't know what to write about... and then on the other hand I do .. I confuse myself daily.  Okay so I guess I should start by saying I had a great New Years Eve we spent it at the church and I brought the new year in standing next to my dad and my hubby playing the guitar and singing amazing grace! It was a beautiful time.. I had a blast! It could not have been more perfect for me than that!  I started changing my way of eating immediatly after New Years Eve...  I went for the week with no Mountain Dew then found myself  craving it more and more.. so I broke down I had some and BOOM that was all she wrote. I fell off the wagon and new plan just as fast as I got on it.  Why is it so hard for me to obey a certain way of eating? I mean honestly in my life I feel like if I can't have the things I want I need to just die... it's wrong I know but it's how I feel inside most the time.
Okay.. so after falling off the wagon I decided I needed to try something different maybe?  I went to the store and got myself a cartoon of Diet. Mt. Dew... I've been told that it was just as bad but c'mon I had to try something.. I am so open for suggestions!!! 
This time of year is so trying for me because of the weather it snows and I'm stuck inside.. the kids are home most everyday I think my kids have attended school about 6 days since before Christmas Break.. My husband takes our only car to work each day so I'm basicly home bound and at the mercy of others to take me places... it sucks!  However in the weather we are having I wouldn't drive anyway >_> I'm too chicken!
I'm trying to do a new way of eating and I have cut back so much but it's still not enough so a few days ago I set on my blog a date that I would post pics of myself etc... got myself all amped to do this and then when it came time to post the photos of me, I made a million reasons not to take them.. sometimes I don't know whats wrong with me.. I can't focus and I can't discipline myself on eating I feel like such a failure... and omg... Sleeping is another thing.. that deserves it's own paragraph!

SLEEPING AHHHH.... I set up all hours of the night, I set and think about everything and I just can't make myself lay down and when I do lay down I find it's so incredibly hard to sleep.  I know this has to stop but I don't know how to deal with it, I have even told my husband that I was thinking of taking some tylenol p.m. to make myself sleep... Maybe I should.. I don't know I've never been much on taking medicines for any reason I'm not against them I just don't really take a lot...  Any suggestions?

So a little progress has been made but you guys I suck and I need so much more work and I'm trying to motivate myself to do it but sometimes it's not easy >_>... I did however make myself a doctors appointment for next Monday I have been having such pain in my feet and aching all over I'm going to see about getting some blood work done and maybe a fasting test for diabetes... I'm really getting worried that I might have that issue soon too...

OH and one more quick thing, My brothers girlfriend had made a suggestion for me to consider Lap Band Surgery.. What are your alls opinions on that...  lemme know!!!

I promise I will write more tomorrow and try to get my nerve to post those pics!!

Thanks for not forgetting me you guys are GREAT!! **HUGS**

Here is a picture of my and my husband taken on December 28, 2010 @ his works Christmas Party... I think I have like three chins going in this one >_>

                  Until tomorrow!! *HUGS****